for now

momma, do you still love the rain?
January 11, 2010
Greedy for Silence
April 27, 2010

i bite the corner of my cushiony lip

and count the symmetrical lines in the pavement

as i walk in no direction in particular

green grass finds a way to grow in cruel places

black and white

i would never dream of stepping on it

i am sure these second-hand shoes

are my  soul mates

a thrift store cinderella

i’ve been used before

hoping for another chance at beauty and belonging

to be a thing that is loved

despite the obvious wear and tear

no need to break me in

calluses on writing fingers

a battle on paper to win back my lost territories

cold finds my exposed skin

and the blood runs away scared

knuckles white and empty

like abandoned seashells

i swaddle myself for warmth

in my widow-black pashmina

the heaving up and down of my chest

transformed into a nebulous secret

hidden underneath

coffee, cream and rambunctious cinnamon

sing a loud and comforting refrain on my tongue

…this will do for now